We know as adults that life is not black and white, right or wrong but as children we were taught differently. Children have an inherent need and desire to want to fit in and to be accepted and validated.
Let’s take a look at your subconscious mind for a minute. It has the software for your involuntary functions, emotions, and habits. Most of your habits and emotional conditioning were programmed in early childhood before you were mature (or adult enough) to make proper decisions. Many were programmed haphazardly and usually by parents, teachers, peers, the media or technology.
Freud said, “We learn as children how we react emotionally and this is carried into adulthood. When we are children, we do not have the faculties that we do in adulthood. We do not know what we are going to need in adulthood to cope. Therefore, as adults we (often) react as children.”
It is important to gain an understanding of how we are subconsciously programmed throughout our lives by the things we hear. It all begins in childhood where an adult has the ability to either “make or break” a child’s spirit purely by the words uttered out of their mouth. From the day we are born, we are bombarded with negative suggestions: “you can’t, you mustn’t, you’re wrong, it’s no use, you haven’t got a chance, it’s not what you know but who you know, what’s the point in trying, life is hard, you just can’t win, don’t trust anybody, age is our enemy, I said No…”
Children are often helpless to negative suggestions, especially when they admire and respect and look up to the person uttering the words. What about the dozens of stories we all hear on a daily basis about impending doom and gloom, crashing stock markets, tsunami waves, cholera outbreaks, a murder and war on the news…Children’s minds are not equipped to assimilate this fear, worry and anxiety and ultimately it leads to insecurity if not properly dealt with.
You know as well as I do that our old programs are still influencing, if not controlling, our behavior even though many are counterproductive. Some may even be destructive. Positive thinking is vital to transform your approach to living, so that you can feel good about yourself, create worthwhile relationships, and also perform successfully. Everything starts with a thought…and every thought in turn creates a feeling…so naturally, if we want to feel good, we need to have positive thoughts. However, we cannot underestimate the power of our beliefs in shaping our thoughts, so it is essential to limit faulty beliefs and to rectify them at an early age, which is what coaching does.
The Kids Life Studio® method of coaching acknowledges the fact that we are faced with negativity on a daily basis and we actively work at empowering children to choose to be positive amidst the chaos. Optimism is a skill that can be learnt and if we can get our children into the habit of being more optimistic, the battle is half won. Positive people achieve positive outcomes through actively setting goals and believing in the power of their own free-will to choose their destiny in life.